Now story that I 'ave to tell you,
Is one of injustice and crime
When berk by the name of Mike 'obday
Thought e'd make some poor 'untsman do time.

It's a tale full of 'eroes and villains
Set in the West Country fair
Caused by bad legislation
Created by that Tony Blair.

First we'll tell of the villains
(You be ready to boo and to 'iss)
For starters there were Jackie Ballard
Whose lips, no sane man would kiss.

For a while she were MP for Taunton
Goodness knows how she won the vote
For she 'ated 'unting and all its supporters
She were as welcome as 'ole in a boat!

Well along came next general election
So 'unting people they stirred
She lost 'er seat, (which was never petite)
A folks 'ad MP they preferred.

Now Ballard she won't too happy
"It's not democratic," she cried
But that's where she were mistaken
So she choked on 'er misplaced pride.

RSPCA were looking for someone
For this job Ballard were right
The redundant social worker
Took the post, just out of spite.

The next in the line-up of rogues
Were a squat little fellow called Mike
For 'unting ban, 'e were number one fan
And the Act 'e thought 'e would like.

Now Blair and his rancid back-benchers
Made a cock-up of their little law
For we've not gone away, we're here to stay,
For every one, now there are four.

Now police they're none too happy
To waste time protecting the fox
But Ballard and 'obday, wanted it their way
Even though 'ounds chased after socks

Some packs they use the exemptions
With 'awks, or flushing to gun
And the Stars of the West, one of the best
Used the latter, though t'weren't so much fun.

Ballard and 'obday weren't 'appy
"'Unting's banned, or so we both thought!"
CPS wouldn't play so League had to pay
For a case to come into court.

So 'obday called up his cronies
And gave them some cameras to use
They went out on't moor, and what they saw
Was what suited their peculiar views

There were folks in their best 'unting kit
And a man with gun crossed the land
They saw but two hounds, heard glorious sounds
Tony on't 'orse with 'is 'orn in 'is 'and.

Well 'ounds they managed to flush Charlie
But sometimes 'e got away
Monitors, they didn't like it
"Shoot 'im - the legal way."

Of five foxes 'ounds flushed that April
Marksman managed to shoot one.
The others were given best
Having escaped the sights of the gun.

Now more than a year later
Our hero, Tony Wright, 'e was called,
To stand in the dock, it were quite a shock
'Unting community - it were appalled.

It were 'obday who caused this injustice
And Judge Palmer, 'e 'eard the case.
Tony were calm, for 'e'd done no 'arm
What Prof. 'arris said were a disgrace.

'e claimed that foxes love livestock,
And never cause lambs any 'arm.
Seems like 'e's never left city
Certainly not lived on't farm.

Furlong, 'e were prosecutor,
With words 'igh, mighty and grand,
Claimed that we'd paid but lip service
And that 'flushing like Tony's were banned.

Judge Palmer 'e 'eard what were said,
And for reasons we can't understand,
Found against pack, in favour of LACs
Poor Tony were fined for his stand.

It's a poor pretty pass when an 'untsman
Can be found guilty for not killing a fox
But in a Brown land, near everthing's banned
'cept chasing some smelly old socks.

'unting people knew Tony were crimeless
An appeal were launched right away
A donation by proxy, to some Labour doxy
Might 'ave done it but that's not our way.

So far this story's of sorrow,
Telling 'ow bigotry wins
But history 'as a grand 'abit,
Of chucking rubbish in't bins.

In year of our Lord '07
As November was fading away
Tother Judge had made his decision
This time, it went Tony's way.

Judge Cottle, a sensible fellow
'eard it all over again,
'e didn't think much of old 'arris
'cos 'e knows that a fox'll eat 'en.

He saw Tony's face, and 'e knew
It's as 'onest as day it is long.
And after due thought, blew the grave morte
On prosecution because it were wrong.

So Tony, our 'ero is guiltless,
We knew this were always the case
'obday 'as wasted League's money
'cos someone missed shooting a brace.

Good news has come out from Devon
It's spreading throughout the land
That Tony is free, and on Exmoor you'll see
'im on 'is 'orse with 'is 'orn in 'is 'and.